India is perhaps the only country in the world with a Joint Family System. Our Indian culture purports respect and support for elders, especially Parents.
Children in Pre-KG Schools are taught the famous verse from Taittreya Upanishad -
"Mathru Devo Bhava,
Pitru Devo Bhava,
Acharya Devo Bhava,
Atithi Devo Bhava"
This roughly translates to:
"Honour your Mother, Father, Teacher (Guru in the real sense) and Guest as - Gods"
It is no secret that we are all taught to regard Parents as visible God; of them, Mother is regarded as the primary and most important; Of what use is a janma, that doesn't allow to take care of one's Mother / both Parents? that too in their old age?! Haven't they given birth? is it not the child's responsibility to return the favour?
Sathya Sai Baba in one of his morning discourses once said: We do not see these days 'Paapabheethi' or 'Daivapreethi' - fear of sin and love of God - anywhere. With Fear of Sin and Love of God, we must try to lead our lives in a disciplined way. This will give us all happiness. We must respect our parents first. If you respect your parents now, your children will know and will certainly respect their parents - you and your wife."
In this Kali-yuga, there seems to be no scope for punar-janma and hence suffering Prarabdha Karma of previous births; what you sow, you shall reap-within this lifetime itself; so all the hardships that one does unto others will revert in some form of sufferring. God help those persons whose parents are wanting to die, dieing everyday or just living to die!!!! True, medical advancements have enanced life expentancy from 41 years in 1956 to 61 years now; but of what use is it if 50% of them are suffering?
Old age homes are not the solution, how ever posh, irrespective of class or facilities provided. The new age name for such homes, but posh is Retirement Homes, but the purpose served is same. In 1998, about 728 registered old age homes existed of which 124 were in Kerala, the highest in any Indian state; today this number has increased many-fold. There are countless such 'homes' whose inmates haven't seen their sons and daughters in many many years; they just seem to wait for the inevitable moksha, liberation from mortal existence - death... and their progeny doesn't seem to care!
Mother Teresa once said of old-age loneliness:
"The most terrible poverty is loneliness and the feeling of being unloved"
The urban malaise is of nuclear families ignoring, abusing or not taking care of their Elders; the rural folks have a similar story with different angle - desertion by younger generation who migrate to cities in search of education / jobs not returning or not even communicating their whereabouts; this results in another problem - most of the Elderly in rural areas (about 88%) are involved in farming as their primary source of income. Since the youngsters migrate to towns / cities - the farming sector, which is the backbone of India, is losing its muscle (strength) to raise food crops in order to feed the burgeoning nation! The problem of Farmers' suicide cases is just not only because of crop-failure or inability fo repay debts; it is also due to loneliness, helplessness, and many such nouns. The government is helpless. Ever heard of North India's staple food crop - Wheat - being imported during say, in the 60's? or Rice from foreign countries? Never! While this is not a reality, yet, that day is not far off, given the current trend.
I recently read a report by Ms. Shubha Soneja about the malady of Elderly Abuse in India, written for WHO on behalf of Helpage India. Various reasons were attributed to the abuse - "Economic situation, Lack of space, Lack of Emotional Support, Failing health, Inconvenience to social circles, simple Disrespect, etc" being major. In all the cases studied, Daughters-in-law were sited as the reason for the unfortunate situations - especially mis-using the IPC 498a that deals with Dowry and harassment, as the respondents cannot even seek recourse before being tried.
Sad sate of affairs:
About 22% of India's elderly population (77 milion) are abused in some form; while the leader, Bangalore, is at 44% , other cities do not lag far behind - Hyderabad (38%), Bhopal (30%), Kolkata (23%); Ahmedabad and Chennai were last - around 2 ~ 5%.
In Delhi, another survey revealed that the most prevalent health problems among the elderly related to mental handicap, orthopaedic and ophthalmic problems. Loneliness, no source of income, and unemployment were also found to be widespread among Delhi’s elderly. However, in Kolkata, lack of adjustment, no source of income, non-fulfilment of basic needs, alcoholism/drug addiction and chronic illness were the major problems.
Verbal abuse, including speaking in loud voice, using foul language, name-calling, accusing and blaming topped (88.6%) the kind of abuse faced by the elderly. According to the survey, nationally, the daughter-in-law emerged as the major abuser (63.4%) followed by the son (44%).
Bangalore tops in ‘emotional abuse’ being reported as the worst form of abuse they encounter – 100%!!
There’s rampant physical abuse too. Among those who experienced this, 56.2% complained of beating, and 50% of restricted movements within the house.
Bangalore is also high in economic abuse. Two in three said these came in the form of illegal taking over of their property by their children. The same proportion also spoke of their personal belongings being taken away from them.
And where this abuse comes from? It actually begins at home. Roughly 57% said it came from their son + daughters-in-law, while 20.4% attributed the trauma to daughters + sons-in-law.
Ironially, as in all celebrated days, there is also a "World Elder Abuse Awareness Day (June 15)” by HelpAge India - that is said to spread awareness; hopefully, they are able to spread enough awareness so that some mindless idiots do stop abusing their elders - if not start respecting them.
Thankfully, Indian Law, now, has regarded mistreatment to elders as 'punishable'. As in Alimony for Divorce, progeny of Elders who are abused, illtreated, abandoned, etc, must, upon directions of the newly set up Tribunal shell out Rs. 10,000 max per person; they are also liable to be punished - with at least Rs. 5,000 as fine or imprisonment for 3 months, or both. Question is, who or how many will be willing or even capable to seek legal recourse? given that they do not have the means to take care of themselves?
In a way, are the elders themsleves responsible for not imparting true discipline, love and affection to their children? May be true in some cases; even so, it is the duty, Dharma, of the children to take care of their parents, as they are taken care from their childhood until they are capable themselves.
Shame on the younger generation who cannot respect their elders, shirk to find time to take care of their needs, abuse and/or abandon them; one can only pray God to give sat-budhdhi and bring them to the right path!
Sanatana Dharma propounds respect to - Mata, Pita, Guru, Deyvam - in that order, as the only means to Moksha - Salvation.
Children in Pre-KG Schools are taught the famous verse from Taittreya Upanishad -
"Mathru Devo Bhava,
Pitru Devo Bhava,
Acharya Devo Bhava,
Atithi Devo Bhava"
This roughly translates to:
"Honour your Mother, Father, Teacher (Guru in the real sense) and Guest as - Gods"
It is no secret that we are all taught to regard Parents as visible God; of them, Mother is regarded as the primary and most important; Of what use is a janma, that doesn't allow to take care of one's Mother / both Parents? that too in their old age?! Haven't they given birth? is it not the child's responsibility to return the favour?
Sathya Sai Baba in one of his morning discourses once said: We do not see these days 'Paapabheethi' or 'Daivapreethi' - fear of sin and love of God - anywhere. With Fear of Sin and Love of God, we must try to lead our lives in a disciplined way. This will give us all happiness. We must respect our parents first. If you respect your parents now, your children will know and will certainly respect their parents - you and your wife."
In this Kali-yuga, there seems to be no scope for punar-janma and hence suffering Prarabdha Karma of previous births; what you sow, you shall reap-within this lifetime itself; so all the hardships that one does unto others will revert in some form of sufferring. God help those persons whose parents are wanting to die, dieing everyday or just living to die!!!! True, medical advancements have enanced life expentancy from 41 years in 1956 to 61 years now; but of what use is it if 50% of them are suffering?
Old age homes are not the solution, how ever posh, irrespective of class or facilities provided. The new age name for such homes, but posh is Retirement Homes, but the purpose served is same. In 1998, about 728 registered old age homes existed of which 124 were in Kerala, the highest in any Indian state; today this number has increased many-fold. There are countless such 'homes' whose inmates haven't seen their sons and daughters in many many years; they just seem to wait for the inevitable moksha, liberation from mortal existence - death... and their progeny doesn't seem to care!
Mother Teresa once said of old-age loneliness:
"The most terrible poverty is loneliness and the feeling of being unloved"
The urban malaise is of nuclear families ignoring, abusing or not taking care of their Elders; the rural folks have a similar story with different angle - desertion by younger generation who migrate to cities in search of education / jobs not returning or not even communicating their whereabouts; this results in another problem - most of the Elderly in rural areas (about 88%) are involved in farming as their primary source of income. Since the youngsters migrate to towns / cities - the farming sector, which is the backbone of India, is losing its muscle (strength) to raise food crops in order to feed the burgeoning nation! The problem of Farmers' suicide cases is just not only because of crop-failure or inability fo repay debts; it is also due to loneliness, helplessness, and many such nouns. The government is helpless. Ever heard of North India's staple food crop - Wheat - being imported during say, in the 60's? or Rice from foreign countries? Never! While this is not a reality, yet, that day is not far off, given the current trend.
I recently read a report by Ms. Shubha Soneja about the malady of Elderly Abuse in India, written for WHO on behalf of Helpage India. Various reasons were attributed to the abuse - "Economic situation, Lack of space, Lack of Emotional Support, Failing health, Inconvenience to social circles, simple Disrespect, etc" being major. In all the cases studied, Daughters-in-law were sited as the reason for the unfortunate situations - especially mis-using the IPC 498a that deals with Dowry and harassment, as the respondents cannot even seek recourse before being tried.
Sad sate of affairs:
About 22% of India's elderly population (77 milion) are abused in some form; while the leader, Bangalore, is at 44% , other cities do not lag far behind - Hyderabad (38%), Bhopal (30%), Kolkata (23%); Ahmedabad and Chennai were last - around 2 ~ 5%.
In Delhi, another survey revealed that the most prevalent health problems among the elderly related to mental handicap, orthopaedic and ophthalmic problems. Loneliness, no source of income, and unemployment were also found to be widespread among Delhi’s elderly. However, in Kolkata, lack of adjustment, no source of income, non-fulfilment of basic needs, alcoholism/drug addiction and chronic illness were the major problems.
Verbal abuse, including speaking in loud voice, using foul language, name-calling, accusing and blaming topped (88.6%) the kind of abuse faced by the elderly. According to the survey, nationally, the daughter-in-law emerged as the major abuser (63.4%) followed by the son (44%).
Bangalore tops in ‘emotional abuse’ being reported as the worst form of abuse they encounter – 100%!!
There’s rampant physical abuse too. Among those who experienced this, 56.2% complained of beating, and 50% of restricted movements within the house.
Bangalore is also high in economic abuse. Two in three said these came in the form of illegal taking over of their property by their children. The same proportion also spoke of their personal belongings being taken away from them.
And where this abuse comes from? It actually begins at home. Roughly 57% said it came from their son + daughters-in-law, while 20.4% attributed the trauma to daughters + sons-in-law.
Ironially, as in all celebrated days, there is also a "World Elder Abuse Awareness Day (June 15)” by HelpAge India - that is said to spread awareness; hopefully, they are able to spread enough awareness so that some mindless idiots do stop abusing their elders - if not start respecting them.
Thankfully, Indian Law, now, has regarded mistreatment to elders as 'punishable'. As in Alimony for Divorce, progeny of Elders who are abused, illtreated, abandoned, etc, must, upon directions of the newly set up Tribunal shell out Rs. 10,000 max per person; they are also liable to be punished - with at least Rs. 5,000 as fine or imprisonment for 3 months, or both. Question is, who or how many will be willing or even capable to seek legal recourse? given that they do not have the means to take care of themselves?
In a way, are the elders themsleves responsible for not imparting true discipline, love and affection to their children? May be true in some cases; even so, it is the duty, Dharma, of the children to take care of their parents, as they are taken care from their childhood until they are capable themselves.
Shame on the younger generation who cannot respect their elders, shirk to find time to take care of their needs, abuse and/or abandon them; one can only pray God to give sat-budhdhi and bring them to the right path!
Sanatana Dharma propounds respect to - Mata, Pita, Guru, Deyvam - in that order, as the only means to Moksha - Salvation.
